Back Pain - My doctor frowned

It started with long hours at my desk, but soon my back pain crept into everything.

I saw doctors, specialists, physios. Each told me something different, but the message was the same, “Be careful.” Those words became my cage.

After six years, I was a shell of myself. I avoided plans, friends, even sleep because mornings hurt more. When someone on a forum mentioned Dr. John Sarno, I rolled my eyes. “Mind-body pain?” It sounded like blame.

But desperation is a great teacher. I read one article after the other the next day and something in me cracked open. Not my spine, but my understanding.

The idea that my brain might be creating pain to protect me from buried emotions flipped everything. I started journaling, yelling into the void some mornings, crying others.

I stopped rolling and stretching obsessively and began feeling instead. The pain didn’t vanish overnight, but when it flared, I’d ask, “What am I feeling right now?” Sometimes, astonishingly, the pain receded.

My partner didn’t get it at first; my doctor frowned. But little by little, I tested the theory. One morning, I sat at my desk for hours without panic.

Two months later, I noticed days on end when I was completely pain-free.

It’s not linear. I still have off days. But the difference now is belief. 

I no longer see my body as broken. I see it as misunderstood.

Helen

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